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forgetting.
i'm your soul.

Your photo here.

I'm Liying;
Turning 18 on 20Nov
I am in Singapore Poly;
integrated events and project management

I am just a simple girl who wants to get the feeling of belonging from someone, yet not now. (:
Believed that the world will be much simplier without love.




hearts talking.



alternative exits.

Ben
Candy
Cangning
Christine
Glenda
Hannah
Huilin
Joash
Jolene
Junkai
Kailin
Kenneth
Kris
Leslie
Sharon
Shery
Siokyit
SongWei
Tanya
Weiny
Wendy
XiangWei
Yanling
Yarkam
Zhiqi

my days, not yours.

September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009

thank you.

Layout: Kary-yan/Missyan.
Hosts: x o x

Sunday, November 30, 2008

I live my own life.
with pride

Had 3off-days straight and decided to sleep it off.So Mama Pig slept till 1.30pm in the afternoon.Online-d and wasted my life away playing pet society with weiny.


Look at my pet.Cute right. (:
And the other picture is me and weiny's pet.
Twins worzx.


Somehow,i was online the whole day doing moronic stuffs like playing children games that some of them couldn't really stand me.hahaha.Den,Jieying sent me this out of a sudden.


With this song - Kiss Night - 潘玮柏



心有千言万语
却说不出口
舍不得你走
还要握紧你的手
直到天长地久
一起分享这首歌
当爱来的时候
记得别放手
this love is for you
哪怕有多少痛
有我在你左右
陪你实现所有梦
baby kiss night
下次再见
记得我们的约会
晚安
my love 再见
kiss night
谢谢你的爱
让我拥有这舞台
为你唱歌
心有千言万语
却说不出口
舍不得你走
还要握紧你的手
直到天长地久
一起分享这首歌
baby kiss night
下次再见
记得我们的约会
晚安
my love 再见
kiss night
谢谢你的爱
让我拥有这舞台
为你唱歌
stay with me
请你留下来
感觉我的爱
在这样的夜晚
让我陪伴你作伴

别再想
明天还有什么事
等着你等着我去做
听我为你唱歌
kiss night
下次再见
记得我们的约会
对你说声kiss night
下次再见
记得我们的约会
晚安
my love 再见
kiss night
谢谢你的爱
让我拥有这舞台
为你唱歌
对你说声kiss night
下次再见
记得我们的约会
晚安
my love 再见
kiss night
谢谢你的爱
让我拥有这舞台
la....la....


Even though this song is like kinda emo la.More to emo than happy,but,thanks though.its the thought that counts. =D
&yay.its the end of the 2nd day.I haven send out any smses that are meant of him yet.
because
they are all safely kept and saved in my drafts. -_-

If you are seeing this,thanks for torturing.You have won.Even so,i miss you.

loves,



12:05 AM


Friday, November 28, 2008

I'm NOT your option.
i still have dignity.

Wednesday:
Went out with nah and songwei.Enjoyed ourselves fully to the max.Wanted actually to make it foursome,but ahpa(junior) couldn't turn up as he had upset his nose,and had mild sore throat.Nevertheless,to not disappoint JR, we took tons and tons of photos for him to see.Hahaha.Nah brought us to this place to take alot of photos and it turned out nice,im saying the background.LOL.
After that we K-ed at cineleisure and we cam-whored ALOT.(:

After that i went to kranji and sleep over cos Kproductions camp going on.Didn't really sleep and had to go to work with an empty stomach the next day. ):
Enjoyed.













Thursday:
Work was horrible yet at the same time it is good.
I used work to covered up my emotions and my feelings,and that makes me much better.Because Ms Seah's there to talk to me and all.My colleagues drifted my directions away.Half way through work,had to have coffee because i'm dozing off.Thanks to Ms Seah for that packet of coffee,that perked me up for awhile,till 7 when work ended.
After off work,everything went back to square one.
sigh.

Today:
Went back Kranji for graduation farewell dinner.
My presence was awkward - idk should i sit at the senior table or senior senior table,because i graduated from ELDDS last year,and this year i graduated from school.So in the end i sat at the senior seniors table.LoL.Sounded more cool.We were supposed to be called the 'alumnis' but i've got no idea when did the 'Senior Senior' thingy came about.
Ohyes,me and Ning met up at like 4pm and walked to school.We helped out in the kitchen to cook the dinner that the seniors were supposed to eat.Okay,well done.lol,because i cooked and i perspire alot,and i just finish bathing.Okay thats not the point.
The graduates were happy,because they need not care about eldds anymore.HAHA,i am KIDDING. =x Miss tang will kill me for that.
LOL.NOLA~ they happy cos they were treated like kings and queens.They even have showbiz posters made specially for them.GuanYeow and WeiSheng's face were put up on a girl's body lor.OMG.Look super girl,especially Weisheng,damn chio.

OhYES.i saw 'boyfriend'(Vicky)because we begged him to come back for the dinner,and yay! finally saw him after a year.He got girlf already! And he changed alot.hahaha.Ohya! How did Vicky became my 'boyfriend' ah,LOL.joke sia.
Oh! because of the singapore poly competition,we were like super close.Me,Kailing,suren,vicky.We became like super duper bonded and i think thats how he became my 'boyfriend'.LOL.And Cangning claimed that she is a widow tonight cos Suren didnt come,PLEASE.Suren haven die. LOL. =x

uhhuh~

Vicky said sth super sweet to me you know,though its only a joke.But if a guy really tell me this it will be darn sweet =D
"1st love are always hard to forget."
LOL.i was his '1st love'.like you know.cos he don't have any girlfriends before and im his first 'girlfriend'.hahahaha.




ohyes.
Its been almost 2 days since i smsed him.I am like going to 'cui' already.But for myself,for my loved ones,i must be persistant.Breaking down isnt doing them,or doing me any good.I shall not make them unhappy over my matters again.I know they are worried about me.Don't be.
I will be fine soon,i promise.

Crying,
Running,
Escaping,
Hiding,
Confiding,

Thanks dears,you have been there for me.


11:02 AM


Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Thanks for letting me feel like a total shit for the 1st time in my life.
Thanks.
I don't know what can i do anymore.I gave up already..I don't know already..
I dont know how to breathe..
i needa survive..


Good luck; liying.
jiayou.


11:30 PM


Tuesday, November 25, 2008

I'm feeling like shit.
SHIT.

I don't know what are you thinking, or how much you are going to do to push me far far away from you. I don't care about it because i'm not going to leave. I only want to tell you that you are VERY important in my heart, very. And I have to explain to you because your opinions and feelings really meant alot to me. ALOT. You asked me to let go, have you thought of how my life will be like without you?

Wonderful XianSheng did alot for me:
(1) Taught me how to love.
(2) Taught me what is love.
(3) Sweet sweet messages
(4) Never fails to make me smile,laugh,cry,jealous,mad,suicidal cause of him.
(5) Always there whenever I know that my life is going to fall right till the bottom of the roller coaster ride.
(6) Never fails to support me and encourage me with all his smses,and his angry&mad voice, that prevented me from thinking wild.
(7) Never fails to sms/call me at the super uber right time.
(8) Tells me to study hard for my Olevel when i wants to give up right in the middle of the packed schedule of the exams.
(9) Left me speechless at times cause of his directness and stuff.
(10) For capturing my soul,and placed it right next to yours.

Of cause there are many more,but i'm sure i would have to take a super long time to finish it.

Such a wonderful guy; do you think i will let go of him? (:
i won't. because he is just so special that he captured every part of me near him and to him. Though i've thought about giving up before, it will not be so easy for me to give up already,

because i love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. & only you, Mr Neo. =D
I want to be Mrs Neo. :x




Edited/ 10.53pm
But just now that sms from you,made it seemed that its impossible.
Made me think that its a dream too far for me to dream.


9:46 PM


Monday, November 24, 2008

My First Day of Work was tiring.
Busy busy busy.


1st of all; happy 'dream-come-true' to dearest =DD

&work. ._.
I had to do alot of things within 5hours,and oh-me-god, i'm sure i am going have a deep sleep tonight because its super tiring la.And hardly;at 11.40pm,i'm yawning already.Well, today's busy schedule got me thinking after a long time.

(a)Why am i working so hard,
(b)Why should i work so hard,
(c)Who am i working so hard for,
(d)Is it worth it..

Xiansheng,can you answer everything for me?

Yesterday went to godma house and see gerger.Chatted with godma and sisters.Chatted bout kailin's boyf and talked about gerger,talked about ahben(sis's boyf),talked bout jiefu's job and etc etc.Slacked at godma house till like near 10,and took train home.Guess what,on the train i emo-ed.Again.

I told sis,i felt like giving up.Time to time,when i really need him,where is he? But, whenever i have such silly and stupid thoughts,he will appear in front of me,be it smses,calls or what.He will always be there to remind me that he is still here.So whenever guys who treat me very very very well,better den he does came into my life,and sometimes i really do wish i could just let go of him and go with them,however..he will appear again,and somewhat whispers in my ear,

"I'm still here..don't go.."
And tada;i will still be there for him.

I'm stupid i know.I shouldn't be doing all these.I deserve better,like what hannah says.I need a more matured guy to talk care of me,old enough to take care of me.But i wish to stay.1month1week i've put in my heart and soul and lookafter him,remind him about stuffs,talk to him on the phone without fail,made me jealous and all..
I know i have to trust him,i know i need to.
He is busy,he is busy...


Yes,he is STILL busy... *psychos self.


11:33 PM


Friday, November 21, 2008

Yesterday was a very special day for me; [:
And i sincerely thank everyone for making my day a wonderful one.

Full of surprises;heartfelt talks and all, i felt the love. Thank you! (:
And to my 7sisters, there's still next year! : D

I realise that i do have people around me who will use their hearts and soul to plan out the most memorable and wonderful birthday party for me. Haha. Thanks thanks. Especially the embarrassment at Fish&Co. Okay,im going to relate the story once more, bear with me. :x

I was a reTARD - cause tards have no brains.

I was supposed to meet CangNing and GeryJie at CCK. And at about 12plus,Ning told me she was doing some BIG business and will meet us at JurongPt instead,i kept calling her,asking bout her whereabouts because,she told me that her beloved Duane wants her to get for him Some limited edition video games at Suntec,(for goodness sake,i believed).After that i asked her to meet us at CCK since she is able to make it on time,and GeryJie will be late,and she told me she needs to go IMM to get something for her grandma,(I believed again).Well, our original plan was actually to have a meal at Soupkitchen (NOT SoupGarden,Ning). However,Ning found out that the restaurant closes at like 2.30pm. So in the end we didn't eat that,for goodness sake. And we were like happily deciding where to go when i said, "fish and co lor". I don't know why i said that, cos after that i regretted. -_-

We had enormous meals - New York Fish and Chips and Seafood Platter for 2, along with soup of the day and a kola tonic. We were talking about our man(s) and enjoying the delicious meal. I had to leave at 4.30 to be able to make it on time to Hannah's accepella concert at Republic Poly.And guess what, 4.15 i am still at fish&co. Ning went for toilet runs twice,both for less then a minute, and i didn't realise that THOSE video games for Duane was gone. Only after Ning came back the 2nd time, she said "Please continue about..," to Miss Tang. I was still like listening attentively,trying to hear what is MissTang going to say next about... when suddenly,someone tapped on my shoulder,i turned. ._.

Guess what,that box of videogames with the 4leaf alike plastic bag transformed to a chocolatety 4leaf cake with 17candles.HAHA;thanks ah. I was made to stand on the stupid chair holding firesparkle.The fish and co staff did the stupid cheer that made me feel like i'm going to die the next fking minute,because the whole of that level of Jp was looking at me like a super wierdo. And when i went around asking people about this tradition Fish&Co have, they all know ley. Why am i the only stupid one, dunno anything. Ya, and in the end we couldn't finish the cake and gave half of them to the staffs over there. They were like super elated la, cos they couldn't believe that half of the cake is going to be given to them.

And thats the end of the celebration at Fish and Co. I proceeded to basement to get flowers for Hannah's performance at Republic Poly.Helped SongWei buy red roses and i bought a kind of flower - i forgot its name(starts with J).

Cabbed down to Republic poly,fetching Jr. at causeway and arrived late at republic poly. :x SongWei was waiting for us till going to fall asleep liao lor.Den i passed him the roses and we went in. Tried our super best to hide the flowers. Oh ya,i forgot to mention, we sat right in the middle - 1st row. Right beside hannah's conductor. HAHAHAHA. Thats the pawn thing you know. Because hannah needs to see her conductor, and she saw us during her 1st performance cause so easy to spot, and she forgotten a move when she saw us :x Ohya,that noob winked at me, and i think the whole studio can see her wink lor, want to fang dian.
The performance was great,and towards the end, i was SUPPOSED to go and give flowers to hannah with songwei one. In the end Songwei told me, " im going up." - den he took the flowers and walk up. So i happily sit down there, and the whole studio got the 'wooooooo' sound cos he was the only person who present the flowers to her in front of her whole IG and the audience, in the present of hannah's parents. :x How powerful har Songwei. LOL.

Went tuh backstage there and caught hannah's parents. Thanks auntie, uncle for wishing me happy birthday. =D Ohyes,after that we went to eat at YewTee S11, it cost like $50. and hey, on the way there, i was relating the story of fish&co the 3rd time(1st to Jr.2nd to Songwei,3rd to the 3 of them),and they couldnt stop laughing at my stupidity.

"Gullible is taken out from the dictionary," said Songwei.
"Really meh?!" I questioned.

Okay,i can't deny the fact that i'm dumb.After dinner went to one of the many blocks at yewtee and camwhore.The 2 RP students were doing their reflection journal la,and me and jr like laming about.After that we went home sweet home!

-----------------

0000 sharp, ronald wished me happy birthday cause i was on the phone with him.
0000 2seconds, Ken wished me.

and so on. heh.
i received like 20msns + smses by 12.38am. 1st time so many lor~
I'm not sure about the total wishes but i think got 50(friendster,blog,msn,sms,call,face-to-face)
2nd last was Xiangwei - 11.15pm
Last person was Junior - 11.55pm

but the last person i communicated that day wasn't junior.Was Xiansheng(: He woke up at 11.56am,called me to call him back.Sweet boy, though he was sick! I'm happy enough ley.Really. =P

Well, i made 3 wishes this year - I know everyone is curious.LOL :x
1st wish; I wish that xiansheng will recover from his sickness SOON.
2nd wish; I wish to maintain and improve ALLLLL friendships and hope that all my loved ones will be healthy.
3rd wish; ------- (cannot say)























Yay.

Overall, this year birthday is like memorable lor.Very. Thanks everyone!!! Every single soul and heart who wished me happy birthday from the bottom of your heart. I enjoyed myself, and hope you did too! (:
APPRECIATED~! (:

HANNAH! THAT CARD. thank you so much. ^^



1:51 PM


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

What is life suppose to mean;
What is love supposed to be.

Ima trying to keep myself afloat on this vast big sea.Wanting very much to live and breathe.But the two 4 letter words are trying to drown me - badly.Between this and that,and still trying to live..
I wanna live on..
I dont want to think.


8:38 PM


Saturday, November 15, 2008

I want your love;once more.
I want you to tell me you love me.
I want your heart to be with me;

i want you as a birthday present; :/

i love you;and i miss you.


12:36 AM


Thursday, November 13, 2008

First of all;
Happy Birthday Yarkam~

Yesterday;went facial at yanling's ahyi's shop.
Pain siol especially when squeezing those pimples/blackheads,zomg. I feel like dying just at that moment so that i will be numb,and let her do whatever thing and get my alive again. ._. super super super pain,that i kept tearing and tearing and tearing.okay,yalor.Thats all,lols.

Today;was Yarkam's birthday,& we went to bugis ktv there to sing song.
I will upload the pictures tomorrow.(:


10:20 PM



I've learnt alot today.
I shall blog tomorrow.




I'm sorry,i shouldn't cry...


12:29 AM


Tuesday, November 11, 2008

YAYNESS. (:
Its fcuking the end of fcuking o levels,and its time to enjoy and play and work for money!

And so,as promised,after the stupid science paper,the 4 of us - xueqi,yarkam,xiangwei and me were supposed to meet geryjie in school,but she on mc ley,cannot go to school so the trio went to her house instead. :D
WELL,we started the makeup trial kinda late because we were ransacking her house for jewellaries and such,to match with our so beautiful dresses.
Well,i did not take pictures with relations to those necklaces and such becausee i forgot,and i only remembered to take pictures AFTER xueqi finished her makeup,rofl.
Anyway,xueqi and xiangwei needa rush off,so i only have 1 picture of xueqi,and don't have picture of xiangwei !! Let the pictures do all the talking okay. LOL.
(what can make ups say sia.)

This is sexy xueqi with her white makeup,simple and elegant,that matches with her looks,and the pair of seashells earring that she borrowed from geryjie. (: WHITE-NESS!
Yarkam was trying out the different types of eyeshadows lor,like 1st was blue,den it was black and gold (doesn't suit her),den it was white and gold.
Geryjie's collections. ZOMG!

Of cos,this is ME cam-whoring when i was slacking laa.Its not my home lor,and im like lazing around,thinking that its MY own house,rofl.

Yarkam covering her face after realising that its super wierd to have both eyes with different type of makeup.HAHAHA.

Her blue eyes...

Her black and gold eyes...

IN THE END! She chose the freaking blue one,she wants to be a diva queen that night! (: Dance dance and dance. hahaha


THIS IS ME! (:

With the skillful hands of geryjie.........

This is the outcome! (:
I have been wishing for this makeup man,GOLD AND BLACK AND BEIGE AND BRONZE(i think). LOL. super the nice. ;D


With lipstick on, 3layers okay..Damn kuazhang,but its nice laa.My lips look dull,den red,den shiny.hahahaha.So cool~
And most the probably i will look like that that day lor, with my hair made of cos..

Me and yarkam~
LOL.i prefer this peekture.Cos its uber the dark. (:
And yayness,the end of peektures,haha.
So yes,me and yarkam went to yewtee Mrt and ask those salons for their pricing if we want them to help us style our hair.what the heck please,expensivezx. ): After asking,me and yarkam decide to take a train home..And guess what? (: We waited at the stupid wrong side of the train..and went to Kranji.. -.- We were supposed to take the other side and go to freaking choachukang. RAH.
Ohyes,and after that we went home lor~ (:
Thats the end,yay.and im happy. LOL.
Firstly,Olevels ended.
Secondly,I love xiansheng.
Thirdly,xiansheng love me :x (Sorry i bhb. HAHAHAHA :x )
LASTLY; tomorrow is facial dayyyyyy!!! :D
I LOVE YOU! (:


7:04 PM


Monday, November 10, 2008

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRISTINE GOH! (:
17years old liao,grow up liao (:

The group of sisters came out with this idiotic plan initially to give Christine a surprise party at her house,i was suggesting for them to call her house 1st,in case she isn't home,and luckily we did call -.- because she is not at home.BUT! its already too late to regret any decision because chinpin was already at yewtee Mrt and we were on the bus to yewtee already.So we decided to get a cake at yewtee and go over to causeway point to find her cos she was there with her mum,bro..

How the hell did we know that Christine was at CWP?!?!
Stupid ideas creater XiangWei and Fast-brained liying got this stupid plan and lie to christine that i was going to pass her a presenttt cos i cannot contact the rest of them.She bought my story though i think it was rather stupid la.(I think im going to hell cos i lied.) Anyway,i lied to her that my dad was driving me over to cwp den i will go to my ahma's house...She believed lor..(Christine,you think i got so good ah.LOL)
When we reached cwp,we went up to seoul garden and the plotting began.

On the way to the 3rd level of causeway point!! (:


Outside Hallmark,the place where the surprise startsssss...


"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO CHRISTINE,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!"

" I wish for a ......... "




















After that,christine went back for her lunch and we screamed into seoul garden,making the whole seoul garden look at her.LOL. Anddd,we went home (:
On the MRT...


Act studious har. LOL. OLEVELS OVER LIAO DEY.

And yay,thats all. HAHAHAHA.
:x
&Xiansheng was super high today,kept laughing and talking to me on the phone. (: goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood. keep it that way. muacks.


11:21 PM